Tried and True
Methods For Achieving
Mental and Emotional Well-being
(And none of them involve medications)
by Mark Foster, DO
1) Daily exercise. (If you do nothing else on this list, do this.)
a. Get at least thirty minutes every day. More is better.
b. Get your heart beating faster than 110 beats per minute. Break a sweat every time.
c. Do cardio everyday, and do weight/ resistance training two to three times a week.
d. Pick activities you enjoy, and make yourself do something vigorous everyday for two weeks. Hiking, biking, jogging, climbing, swimming, tennis, soccer, basketball, aerobics, kickboxing, cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, home gyms with treadmills, elliptical, rowing machines, even golf--if you walk . . . or just a brisk walk in the evening is perfect. Mix things up to maintain your interest. By the end of two weeks, your mind and body will have become noticeably sharper and more fit, and it will not be an effort to sustain your new habit. You will crave the exercise, and you will find ways to make it fit into your daily routine.
e. Consider playing a competitive sport. They can be great outlets for stresses, great for making social connections and a sense of teamwork, and also for helping you focus your exercise routines.
f. Take satisfaction in knowing that while exercise improves your mental health, it is also improving every other aspect of your health: weight loss, blood pressure, cholesterol, blood sugar, joint health, nerve tone, kidney function, digestive health, immune system, sexual health, skin health, respiratory health, and your overall constitutional health of strength, stamina, resilience, and energy. You will sleep better and have an improved self-concept. All of these benefits from doing something that's fun to do! Get started today!
2) Eat healthy food
a. Don’t eat fast food, and don’t drink soda pop. Seriously. Don't do it. Junk diets make you feel junky inside and out.
b. Avoid excessive sweets.
c. Eat five fresh fruits and vegetables a day. Have something fresh at every meal. Snack on grapes, carrots, apples, celery, etc.
d. Eat savory foods. Good food is one of life's great pleasures. It is possible and enjoyable to prepare and eat delicious, healthy food.
e. Frequently, even daily, eat meals as a family or in the company of others. Eating has always been a social experience for humans. It is likely that some of your best memories as involve a delicious family or social meal.
f. Stay well-hydrated with crystal clear, refreshing water.
3) Daily sunshine
a. We live in Colorado. Get outside and enjoy it!
b. Interact with nature: smell a flower, listen to creek, catch a sunset, watch geese fly, feel a summer breeze on your skin, catch snowflakes on your tongue—and do something like this outdoors, everyday.
4) Celebrate life
a. Grow flowers. Cultivate a vegetable garden. Have houseplants. Plant trees.
b. Get a pet. Dogs, cats, hamsters, fish, lizards, rabbits--there is some cute critter out there that will soften your heart and meet your lifestyle requirements.
c. Ride and take care of horses if you can. Being around horses has proven to be therapeutic for humans.
a. Grow flowers. Cultivate a vegetable garden. Have houseplants. Plant trees.
b. Get a pet. Dogs, cats, hamsters, fish, lizards, rabbits--there is some cute critter out there that will soften your heart and meet your lifestyle requirements.
c. Ride and take care of horses if you can. Being around horses has proven to be therapeutic for humans.
d. Be around infants and children. Nothing is quite as life-affirming as the sound of children laughing or playing in the park.
e. Surround yourself with things that are alive, that give and receive love.
e. Surround yourself with things that are alive, that give and receive love.
5) Daily meditation
a. Prayer
b. Yoga
c. Deep breathing / relaxation techniques
d. “Spend less time as a human doing, and more time as a human being.”
6) Daily journaling
a. Reflect on your life, describe your successes and your struggles, dream about the future. Write for your own benefit. Blogging is great, but your journal is for the audience of you.
b. Go back and read prior entries. See areas of progress, consider room for improvement, get a sense of your continuity of self. In all great stories, the heroes must overcome great obstacles before achieving their greatest triumphs. Be a hero on your journey through life!
7) Daily supportive conversations with a trusted friend
a. Seek out healthy, nurturing relationships. Be around people who inspire you.
b. Listen, and let yourself be listened to, if only for a few minutes.
c. No one is an island. We need each other, and others need us!
d. Email and texting are great, but go for face-to-face conversation.
8) Get plenty of sleep
a. Most people need at least eight hours of restful sleep each night
b. Have a regular bedtime routine, don’t go to bed too late or get up too late
c. Take a twenty minute power nap during the day if you can. It will do wonders.
d. Pay attention to your dreams, and what they are trying to tell you. Write them down, and figure out what they mean for you. You will be surprised.
9) Seek service opportunities
a. Volunteer at schools, churches, community organizations, international missions.
b. Forget about your own problems, and make a difference in somebody else’s life.
10) Fill your mind with positive messages
a. Read good books, watch inspiring movies, listen to uplifting music.
b. Try a "news fast" for a week. Turn off the news. Don't read the newspaper. Stay away from the hysterics of the blogosphere. Allow yourself the luxury of living only within your own sphere of influence for a week. So much of our anxiety comes from internalizing news events that are beyond our influence.
11) Be creative
a. Try painting or sculpture. Try crocheting or cooking. Write music or poetry. Even if you think it's no good, even if your only audience if yourself, express yourself!
b. Transform your inner world into a unique creation, express things for which there are no words, no text books, no guidelines, no defined feelings.
c. Release the artist within. Leave your unique mark on the world. You have something to say that can only be said by you, because you are totally unique.
12) Keep a positive attitude
a. Hope for a better world and a better life. Never give up!
b. When things seem overwhelming, take one step at a time.
c. Things will get better. The sun will rise tomorrow, and you will find a way to cope. We hurt and then we heal. We suffer and then we recover. The pull is towards wellness and wholeness.
d. Take responsibility for your moods, your actions, and your reactions. In the end, we create and control our own inner weather.
e. Be gentle and kind with yourself. Give yourself permission to feel down, to hurt, to be human, but then expect yourself to get right back up. We are resilient beings, and our brains and souls can heal.
f. The expert in anything was once a beginner. Life is a journey, not a destination. Be patient with your progress.
13) Integrate your feelings and thought patterns.
a. To be human is to feel emotions, both positive and negative. You don't want to be numb to life. Be fully alive and responsive to your emotional state.
b. Relish moments of joy and peace. These are the exquisite moments of aliveness that frame all of our memories and expectations.
c. Give yourself permission to feel depressed, anxious, scared, confused. That's okay.
d. Work through your negative feelings. Within the turmoil of the moment, there is something valuable for you to learn about yourself. Harness the intensity of the emotions, and make changes where needed.
e. Remember the Prayer of Serenity, printed below. Even if you are an atheist, then consider how you could apply the sentiment of this prayer to your own value system. One some level, we need to surrender our problems to a greater power, be it to your personal vision of God or to your own conception of the creative power that binds the universe together and creates life and consciousness. May the Force be with you!
f. Maintain perspective. Emotions are powerful and necessary, but you are more than the sum of your emotions. You are a soul traveling through time, and your emotions are the changing weather patterns you will encounter. There will be both sunny and rainy days, summer vacations and winter blues. Accept the inevitable changes in your internal weather as temporary, meaningful, cyclical and essential to being fully human.
g. Read "Man's Search For Meaning" by Viktor Frankl, the account of a Jewish psychiatrist who survived the Nazi concentration camps. In this one short book, which is at times horrifying and at times sublimely beautiful, you will gain an intense appreciation for the preciousness and uniqueness of your own life, and how you may derive meaning from even your most difficult trials.
14) Work with a trusted professional counselor, therapist or pastor.
a. Sometimes we all need a coach to help us achieve our fullest potential, to help us recognize our faulty thought-patterns, and to point the way forward when things seem dark and uncertain.
b. There is no "one best way" to do therapy that fits all people. In fact, there are dozens of specific disciplines, and within each discipline the therapy is as individualized as the therapist. Find something and someone that works for you, that matches with your life experiences, values, and expectations. Get recommendations from friends and family, and interview potential therapists until you find one that seems a good fit.
c. The most important ingredients in successful therapy are trust, empathy, and flexibility. If you have engaged in a therapeutic relationship that is not working for you, then don't feel bad in seeking another approach from another therapist.
d. Your counselor, therapist or pastor is a human, too. They come to your sessions with their own ingrained habits, preconceptions, and personal feelings. Plus, they are silently dealing with their own issues. Sometimes, they will have a bad day, too. Accept their shared humanity and their flaws, and find a way to make the relationship mutually beneficial.
The Prayer of Serenity
Lord, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr
-- by Max Ehrmann
Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexatious to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love,
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
